The news that derails a little

Iserbyt says the Koppenberg is not so hard, Xavier digs out his segment done on foot

The Koppenbergcross is run this Sunday, 1 November, on the Melden hill. Eli Iserbyt tells Sporza he does not understand the riders who dread it, and Thibau Nys makes his (re)entry there.

Xavier at the top of a cobbled climb, bike in hand and backpack on, checking his bike computer while a cyclist zigzags on foot behind him.

Eli Iserbyt spoke to Sporza ahead of Sunday’s Koppenbergcross. Many cyclocross riders are not keen on the Koppenberg, and he says he has little understanding for that. “I find it a sophism to say the Koppenberg is difficult,” he said. And later: “That’s nonsense. Train and perform.”

Right. I have the segment. Not the cross one, the road one, the day before the Ronde (the Tour of Flanders), with the sportive riders. Three times. All three times I did it on foot, cleats slipping on the cobbles, bike in my hand and a guy in front of me zigzagging while walking, which I would not have thought possible.

So I do my column. Take off the backpack. Take off the guy who zigzags. Take off the fact that I was on foot, which, I admit, counts in the calculation. What is left is a forty-seven-year-old man at the top of the Koppenberg, and that man can discuss the word “sophism”.

What made me think was something else. Iserbyt says the course ten years ago was completely different and that now you hit the Koppenberg cold, straight from the start. According to him, some riders already know at the top that their cross is over. That I know. On a Sunday, I know at the café at twenty past nine that my ride is over. We set off anyway.

And then there is the other sentence: “The intention has to be there, otherwise there is no need to start.” I have had the intention for three editions. It is the rest that follows on foot.

Thibau Nys makes his (re)entry on Sunday, on that very hill. Paul Herygers thinks he will aim for the top step straight away. I’m not saying I’d do better, mind you. I’m saying we can talk about the climb. The descent, less so.

At the café, we argued about intention till noon, and nobody suggested going to have a look on site.

It’s true, we checked: Sporza.

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Our columnists’ reactions are fictional; the facts and real quotes are sourced above.

The other angles in French

The editor-in-chief chose this one: « A et C tiennent tous les critères ; A l'emporte parce que le gag naît d'une scène vécue (à pied, derrière un marcheur qui zigzague) que le lecteur cyclo reconnaît immédiatement. C est plus froid et sa chute s'égare. »

SandrineThe Mechanic

Le Koppenberg s’attaque à froid dès le départ, selon Iserbyt, Sandrine pense au braquet

Avant la Koppenbergcross du 1er novembre, Eli Iserbyt explique à Sporza que le parcours a changé en dix ans et qu'on attaque désormais la bosse de Melden dès le départ. Il juge « n'importe quoi » la crainte de nombreux crossers.

  • Funniness 3/5
  • Faithfulness 4/5
  • Voice 4/5
  • Retweet 4/5
  • Good nature 4/5

The editor-in-chief’s comment Relire « à froid » comme une transmission est une bonne idée de métier, mais le paragraphe énumère au lieu de chuter, et le titre promet un braquet que le corps ne livre pas.

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MyriamThe Commissaire

Iserbyt exige « l’intention » au départ du Koppenberg, Myriam cherche la case du formulaire

Eli Iserbyt, à Sporza, estime que l'intention doit être là au départ de la Koppenbergcross du 1er novembre, sinon il n'est pas utile de partir. Paul Herygers comprend, lui, les crossers qui s'accordent une demi-journée de repos.

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  • Faithfulness 5/5
  • Voice 5/5
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The editor-in-chief’s comment La case manquante pour l'intention et « il n'y a pas de classement pour l'absence » sont du pur Myriam ; la dernière phrase sur le Mur de Huy est obscure et affaiblit la fin.

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